Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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