Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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