if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
