we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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