Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
