That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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