She's JV to your varsity
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
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