5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
