I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
