Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin

(262): View more from Wisconsin

your sister was..

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(603): she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin (262): your sister was.. http://tfl.nu/c3sq

Replies (18) Good night (5260) Bad night (1488)
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(+44): View more from England

I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.

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(+44): I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment. http://tfl.nu/zeo3

Replies (37) Good night (7311) Bad night (970)
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(915): View more from Texas

I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic

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(915): I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic http://tfl.nu/4fd0

Replies (35) Good night (3653) Bad night (1689)
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(330): View more from Ohio

Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.

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(330): Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you. http://tfl.nu/fmxs

Replies (38) Good night (8022) Bad night (1648)
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(561): View more from Florida

oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything

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(561): oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything http://tfl.nu/egks

Replies (10) Good night (3726) Bad night (1489)
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(808): View more from Hawaii

you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech

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(808): you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech http://tfl.nu/bl5m

Replies (25) Good night (4639) Bad night (1496)
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(773): View more from Illinois

At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me

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(773): At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me http://tfl.nu/wnez

Replies (4) Good night (3063) Bad night (1381)
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(517): View more from Michigan

Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.

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(517): Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning. http://tfl.nu/hea7

Replies (8) Good night (3314) Bad night (892)
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(646): View more from New York

but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered

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(646): but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered http://tfl.nu/sriz

Replies (8) Good night (3604) Bad night (952)
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(530): View more from California

At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.

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(530): At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up. http://tfl.nu/1byu

Replies (1) Good night (1460) Bad night (568)
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(612): View more from Minnesota

It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course

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(612): It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course http://tfl.nu/673n

Replies (2) Good night (1266) Bad night (528)
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(787): View more from Puerto Rico

It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.

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(787): It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life. http://tfl.nu/p96v

Replies (1) Good night (672) Bad night (362)
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(908): View more from New Jersey

Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.

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(908): Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you. http://tfl.nu/4vsb

Replies (0) Good night (680) Bad night (356)
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(973): View more from New Jersey

I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead

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(973): I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead http://tfl.nu/zr0a

Replies (0) Good night (460) Bad night (272)
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(905): View more from Ontario

what's your room number? I've never been there sober...

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(905): what's your room number? I've never been there sober... http://tfl.nu/xgwd

Replies (0) Good night (547) Bad night (176)

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