I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Randomize
