Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
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