You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
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he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
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No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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