is your mom at the bar?
I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
