Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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