we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
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ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
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Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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