So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
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He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
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