How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
