I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Randomize