Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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