I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize