i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Can I ask u a weird question?
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.