either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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