"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Operation Purity has been aborted
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.