I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Randomize
