Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
