Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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