Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
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