At least make sure they are 18
Why
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
