Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Randomize
