I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
