I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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