Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize
