I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
This is sufficient.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.