Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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