just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
