I'm going to jail i love you
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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