i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Randomize
