I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
