Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
