Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
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