So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
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