Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Randomize
