They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...