There's a naked man in my car right now.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
No idea. I blame fireball.
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station