I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Four minutes until I can fart!
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...