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Last Night in Massachusetts (617)

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We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"

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(617): We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?" http://tfl.nu/sgk0

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I would do horrible things to your vagina.

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Prove it.

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(617): I would do horrible things to your vagina. (978): Prove it. http://tfl.nu/qld3

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i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers

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(617): i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers http://tfl.nu/ovgd

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She said she didn't have time to shave "there"

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Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.

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(781): She said she didn't have time to shave "there" (617): Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster. http://tfl.nu/ama3

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i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion

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(617): i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion http://tfl.nu/4vyu

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She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.

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(617): She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her. http://tfl.nu/25nb

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ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...

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(617): ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day... http://tfl.nu/iy3f

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so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it

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only you. it could only happen to you.

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(617): so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it (1-617): only you. it could only happen to you. http://tfl.nu/wr6i

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That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.

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(617): That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head. http://tfl.nu/g2zg

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i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore

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(617): i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore http://tfl.nu/4xlx

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gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.

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(617): gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist. http://tfl.nu/2uj6

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There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.

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(617): There's a vagina buried somewhere in there. http://tfl.nu/t83u

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she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.

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(617): she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment. http://tfl.nu/vrz7

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Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life

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(617): Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life http://tfl.nu/020c

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it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.

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(617): it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina. http://tfl.nu/7xv1

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Last Night in Massachusetts (617)

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