I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
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but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.