You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
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get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
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I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.