He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?